Honest and real post coming up…………. So as you can tell I havn’t blogged in forever, there have been many reasons. To be honest first of all life threw many changes my way over the last few months, some for the better and some not so much. It really took me a long time to adjust which was very unlike me.
Its started off with making the decision to finish up work due to the hours just not working out, after working for the last eleven years and five years with the company I was with, It was a MASSIVE change. This change also led to us having to get rid of our second car and that was one of the biggest changes for me. Being independent for the last few years, being able to get up and go or even pop in to visit my family really helped my mental health and also gave me some down time with Eva. The adjustment for me took months! Discovering life as a stay at home mom,not having a routine, putting too much pressure on myself as a parent and not being independent anymore took its toll on my mental health. I stopped looking after myself, I became quite upset at little things and just felt drained daily, it was a downward spiral. I forgot about self care which was drilled into me in college as well as work. During this time, we found out we were expecting baby number two! This came as quite a surprise but I’m not going to lie it really helped me to kick myself out of the funk I was in. It slowly dawned on me If I didn’t start to fill my cup up on a daily/weekly basis with one child how will I manage with two?? So after five months being at home, I finally found our groove and started to pull myself together, even though pregnancy tiredness kicked my butt daily.
13 weeks Baby Malan no.2
Some of the things that really helped me gain control of my mental health again ;
- I made sure to make plans on days that I had the car for a while .
- As being a stay at home mom I started to live by the mantra ‘ everything else could wait till tomorrow’.
- Get out once a day! Even it was just for a quick walk or a run around the green, the fresh air really helped clear my head and I know Eva loved it too.
- I’m going to sound like the biggest granny now but knitting was my go to hobby, to me it was so relaxing so find something for yourself , whether its reading a book or just listening to a podcast.
- Letting go of expectations I put on myself! This was a hard one as I felt I was at home all day, the house should be spotless, we should be eating home cooked meals and planning a million activities with Eva as I felt she wasn’t getting enough sensory stimulation. I’m sure in a perfect world that would be the case but nope not in our house, it just became overwhelming. Its all about balance and figuring out what works for you.
- Working out! This is something I started doing daily just before I found out I was pregnant and really set me up for the day. Lately my workouts are chasing a curious toddler around a supermarket but I’m ok with that.
- Last but not least was waking up before Eva does. Again this hasn’t been happening lately due to our little lady having three ear infections in the last three months and she also likes to party all night.
Basically the reason I wanted to write this blog was to encourage other moms out there , that they are not alone and to make sure they look after themselves. I find as a mom , you put others first and leave very little left in your own cup for yourself. I found once I start to look after myself whether it’s taking time out for a bath, quick face mask or what I started doing recently was going to the cinema in the morning by myself( dates are hard to come by in our house and the time alone to switch off is so nice), doing little things for my self and getting myself into a routine really gave my mental health a boost. It really brought new meaning to the term ‘Happy Mom, Happy Baby’. My relationship with Eva began to thrive after this and so did my relationship with my husband.
How are ways you fill up your cup daily or even weekly?